Paddy died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the
Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, 'What
are all those clocks?'
St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a
Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.'
'Oh,' said the Paddy 'Whose clock is that?'
'That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that
she never told a lie.'
'Incredible,' said the Paddy. 'And whose clock is that one?'
St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have
moved twice telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life.'
'Where's Bertie Aherne's?' asked the man.
'Bertie's clock is in God's office. He's using it as a fan.'